MARREN: Kids write the darndest things

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Tim Marren / Lockport Union-Sun & Journal Managing Editor

July 24, 2010

By Tim Marren Lockport Union-Sun & Journal The Lockport Union-Sun %26 Journal Sat Jul 24, 2010, 06:36 PM EDT

Newspapers get all sorts of letters. Obviously “letters to the editor” are most common, but the newsroom gets letters from all different sources.

We get letters from inmates and from families of those who think their loved one is not guilty. We’ve even got some letters from a guy with a little-to-serious fascination with one of our staffers.

We get letters from the over-the-top religious types. Those are pretty common.

And from time to time we get letters from kids. Cute, pencil-written letters penned by our youngest readers.

These are my favorite.

While I stash away some of the crazier prisoner letters for a book I’ll write in retirement, it’s the letters from children that bring a smile to my face on the worst of days.

I figured it would be fun to share a few of the letters from kids and hopefully they’ll bring a smile to your face as well.

(I’m going to omit last names of the children.)

•••

The following came to us as a question for the Ask Shagg feature that runs in the Sunday comics:

Dear Shagg:

Is it true that dog’s tongues are cleaner than people’s?

Sincerely,

Nick

Wilson, N.Y.

NUMBER 1 FAN!!!

We sent this letter to Shagg for Nick from Wilson. Not sure if he ever answered Nick’s query, but we’re sure Shagg gets a lot of mail from the younger readers.

I did an Internet search and it appears that the “dog tongue is cleaner than a human’s tongue” idea is an urban legend. It seems to have gone through the years as fact but can’t be proven. If anything most experts think it may be less clean than a human — especially consider what we’ve all seen dogs do with their tongues and mouth.

•••

Dear editor of the Lockport Union-Sun & Journal,

My name is John. I am in Boy Scout Troop 18. I am working on my communication merit badge so I wrote to you. It said I could write about anything so I wrote about this. Have a nice day or tienes un buenos dia hoy!

Sincerely,

John

If you followed this, apparently he had to write to the paper to earn his badge, so he wrote to the paper to say he had to write to the paper. Still with me.?Then the little scout threw in some Spanish. God knows if it was right or not, but it impressed me.

•••

Dear Union Sun & Journal,

Hi I’m Margaret. I’m 8 and I’m from Medina, N.Y. I was wondering if you could make a small section listing new and old video games of all sorts. Sorted by system though. And information on upcoming games.

You can add ads if you want.

I thought of this idea this morning because I love video games and sometimes I read your paper at my grandparent’s house. I’d be really greatful and happy if you could make the video game section. You could add all video game stuff. I’d like it to only come on Wednsdays and Fridays. If possible please write back.

Sincerlly,

Margaret

p.s. If you do this (possibly) more children will read your newspaper.

This one is classic. Margaret defines cute. She also is a letter-to-the-editor writer in the making. I can just see her writing to this paper as an adult. She’s so informed and knows what she wants to see in her newspaper — even if it is just Wednesdays and Fridays.

She also knows how we need to sell ads to make a section like the video game section possible.

To answer her question, I’m looking at sources for this type of content. If I can find a syndicate that provides the type of video game listings she’s looking for, you can bet I’m going to put it in the newspaper.

If there’s anything we need it’s younger readers. But I don’t have to tell Margaret that, she already knows that filling the newspaper with video game listings might possibly lead to more children reading the paper.

And maybe more will write in.

Tim Marren is managing editor of the Lockport Union-Sun & Journal. Contact him at tim.marren@

lockportjournal.com or 439-9222.

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